It's been several weeks since the new year which means that gymns are finally starting to empty out as people once more drop out of their new fitness regime. Personally, my favourite machine at the gymn is the vending machine.

There's not been a huge amount in the news this week although I saw a headline "Shark Swims Ashore in New Jersey" - I didn't know sharks wore jerseys, or any clothing for that matter. That joke is of course also the answer to the question, "What did Delaware"

There is however the two stories here about Israel.

The 1st of these is the ICJ's decision in the Hague to accuse Israel of Genocidal acts and it's almost a parody of itself. It doesn't actually go so far as saying that, so much as being a very legal-speak version of saying it's going to look into it and come to a decision in a few years. It's the sort of decision where you'd expect they'd want to act quickly, otherwise it's like writing a letter to your local fire station to ask them to extinguish your house. Anyway, it reminds me of the old joke about what's the difference between a politician and a lawyer? The answer being that they both lie to you but the lawyer does it slowly and in latin. This court case by the way was brought by South Africa, which is only about one national election away from its own genocide, though there is a 2nd pending case brought by Indonesia. That country however is having to go down a different legal angle, citing "policies and practices” in the occupied Palestinian territories. Hilariously enough this is because Indonesia doesn't recognise international genocide law, owing to problems in its own recent history. I believe next month the court is also ruling on the case of the pot vs the kettle.

The other Israel story this week is about the United Nations Relief and Works Agency. This is the agency that supports humanitarian work in Palestine. Wait no, as it turns out, it was actually quite involved and complicit in the Hamas attacks last October and so funding has been therefore been put on pause by half a dozen countries including the UK and Canada. Presumably the UN staff misunderstood the memo about the new uniforms and being dressed to kill. Just like how when the UN went to the Rwandan civil war, it observed a minutes silence by handing out silencers to the rebels. The UN is a joke and just a BBC panel show show it's quite dated and not very funny.