2022 Jul 08 - Boris Resigns

Boris Johnson was finally forced to step down this week after weeks of speculation. Wednesday morning saw a landslide of resignations with the cabinet falling apart faster than an old one from Ikea. Officially he’ll remain in the job until the Conservative party chooses a new leader and he can get a reasonable quote from a moving company, good luck with that right now.

The last week had started off the same as previous weeks but the important thing to remember is that Boris himself had said that it would be “Irresponsible” to resign, and so at that point it was guaranteed that the prime minister known for being irresponsible would likely be gone soon. In the end the straw that broke the camels back was the emergence of the backstory of Chris Pincher, the Deputy Chief Whip who had to step down over a serious of allegations made against him. When MPs said that they’d felt the pinch they’re not talking about the cost of living. So then it was sadly inevitable that it turned out that the prime minister knew everything at the time but once more tried to cover the story up, as he’d done with the parties at number 10 and various other scandals like how many kids he has.

As an opening salvo to the battle to force the Prime Minister out, Tuesday saw Sajid Javid and Rishi Sunak both turn in their resignations although there could be a job opening for Sajid because it’s only a matter of time before the diversity obsessed BBC or Netflix remake the Adams family and cast him as Uncle Fester. If you think that’s a silly proposition, the 2nd most read story on the BBCs website right now is “Friends creator admitted show used wrong pronouns”

Who will be the next PM? If I had to put down £50 I’d say Ben Wallace. The job as PM has for decades swapped between well known charismatic people and lesser known dull people and now it’s time for some boring stewardship of the country. Certainly the Labour Party and the SNP might regret the fact that their demands for Boris to resign have been answered because once you remove him and his unique cloud of scandal, the Conservative party once more looks like a pretty reasonable group of people that the public might vote for at the next election.
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