2021 Feb 20 - Harry, Australia & Mars

A couple news stories this wee. Prince Harry has been told he’s not allowed to wear formal British Army dress at official functions any more. The new directive of course is an expansion on the existing rule about not wearing German military clothing after that story in the Sun a few years ago. His grandfather the Duke of Edinburgh has also been taken into hospital and so it’s a tense time for newspaper editors up and down the land as they wait to see if it’s time to finally send out the commemorative magazines they no doubt printed years ago. Let’s just hope they didn’t include too many pictures of Prince Andrew. I heard a discussion over lunch about whether when Prince Phillip passes they plan to bury or possibly cremate him and it really put me off my Greek kebab.

Also a big story from Australia, also known as the land down under, except on Saturdays when the nickname is switched to ‘the land hungover’. They’ve gotten in an argument with Facebook whereby Facebook have decided to shut down certain news services and sharing options rather than pay a new tax to benefit local news providers. People writing news in an office in Melbourne rather than Belarus is so often Facebooks way. Although if we’re being honest here the main beneficiary from the payments would be News International and thus Australian tycoon Rupert Murdoch so in many respects I can see both sides of the story. Would Facebook be forced to hand money over to all content providers, fake or otherwise, or would perhaps an unelected commission get to decided what news the public were allowed to read? It’s all very 1984, or possibly 1985 would be a better year, that’s when Neighbors started and also Mad Max 3 Thunderdome came out. I always thoguht the problem with Mad Max is that if they just slowed down a little bit then their cars would get better fuel economy and they wouldn’t have to fight over the petrol so much

Anyway, in other sandy dry desert news, Thursday saw Nasa land the Perseverance rover on Mars which was greeted with great excitement although if you look up Mars on Yelp it only has a 1-star review, something about lacking atmosphere. Also very bad mobile internet speeds too: it says on Wikipedia that Mars only has 0.4g. Anyway, it’s been 8 years or so since Nasa last sent their last rover to Mars which is pretty impressive beacuse I once had a rover and it could barely make it to Sainsburies let alone off-world. One of my hopes for this mission is that it will once and all prove that they did in fact send it to Mars and not to a dessert in New Mexico where a combination of rain and snow currently make New Mexico look more like Newcastle. Less like the sandy planet in star wars and more the icy one but best wishes to them. I also saw a Nasa official who said that the 2012 Curiosity rover reminded him of when he met his wife: it was supposed to last a few months but here he was 14 years on. The technology behind it is all is pretty impressive although I was confused by an article stating “the software that got it to Mars' surface must now be exchanged for a software system that enables the robot to drive across that surface.” Perhaps memory cards were too expensive to install both sets before it set off, or they just took a leaf out of Elon Musks Tesla playbook with his constant software upgrades, I guess we’ll find out in a few years when SpaceX launches its own mission there. Personally I’ve been wondering if when Elon Musk eventually sends people to Mars, he’ll hire a number of Muslim Astronauts so that they can travel to mars and construct Elons Mosque.
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2021 Feb 14 - Year of the Ox

Happy Chinese new year, apparently it’s the Year of the Ox, not to be mistaken for the year of the pox, which was last year. One of my favourite stories from China this week was the communist party’s decision to ban the BBC due to its “Unfair, Untruthful Journalism” which kinda makes me wish that Boris took a leaf out of Beijing’s book: if the PM wants to sort out the thing with the French fishermen he could start treating the English Channel the way that they treat the China sea. Ob ......

2021 Feb 07 - Newspaper Review

This week I was going to take a look at the headlines in the various Sunday Papers but it's all the same corona stuff about how Boris is on the road to de-mask us (damascus)

So anyway let's look at some of the other front page things

The Telegraph has a story about how Prince Charles wants to save the planet by ditching scientific jargon. He would have done better making that suggestion 25 years ago so that words like 'velocity' 'underpass' and 'blood alcohol' weren't known. He's also behind t ......

2021 Jan 31 - Gamestop Shares

Let’s go for a bit of financial news this week. Normally when stories about business make it into the headlines it means one of only 5 things:

1) Petrol Prices are up and the BBC blames it on Brexit
2) Petrol Prices are down and the BBC claim that it's the start of a Brexit-induced recession
3) Maybe petrol prices are flat but an economist from the Labour Party is brought on about wider Brexit-related economic concerns. You know, I'm starting to spot a trend here...
4) Maybe unemployment is u ......

2021 Jan 24 - Trump Out Biden In

And thus ends four years of President Trump, and the Queen moves onto eventually meeting her 13th US President. Unlucky for some, especially if you live in Syria where the last 4 years have been somewhat of a reprieve from the Obama-Biden era. President Trump though. I’ve found it strange and astonishing that many people I know in remote parts of the UK have seemingly spent the past 4 obsessing over him, despite him having as much impact in their day-to-day life as my choice of breakfast today ......

2021 Jan 17 - Government Waste

They say that "money talks" but when it comes to the government, all that ever says is good-bye as civil servants keep frittering it away like they're embarrassed to be seen with. And here you and I are watching it all from the sidelines, though I once met someone who says that the trick is to stop thinking of it as ‘your’ money.

Anyway, sit back as I count down some of the worse examples of UK government largesse

10) Nationalised industries
I thought I'd start of a prologue of sorts to sh ......

2021 Jan 10 - Washington DC Chaos

Chaos this week in America with videos of a brawl and takeover of the capitol building that were both exciting, yet also slightly dull because normally when you see that sort of stuff happening, someone like Steven Seagal shows up. Or maybe Michael Bay is filming it so for some reason stones and rocks are suddenly flammable because physics in his world makes about as much sense as the concepts like integrity or decency in the world of Washington DC.

As to the violence and bloodshed, the main st ......

2021 Jan 02 - Happy New Year

Welcome back, how was everyone's Christmas break? Hopefully better than at Debenhams where they apparently had to cancel their nativity play due to a lack of a prophet (profit). In my house a memorable highpoint (or lowlight) was when someone tried to use "Brexit" as a word in Scrabble and thus caused a bit of an argument as to whether it was allowed or not, although at least after we confirmed the rules we accepted the result rather than trying to drag the game into next Christmas. Did you hear ......

2020 Dec 14 - 12 Days of Christmas

With both Brexit and Christmas only a couple weeks away I thought I’d look at how the 12 days of Christmas are looking this year.

Twelve drummers drumming. There’s an old joke about two cowboys riding through a canyon and they hear the ominous sound of drums beating. One of them said, "I don't like the sound of those drums." And a distant voice shouts out "He's not our regular drummer!" But anyway, most of the drummers I’ve seen the last year or two were the peoples referendum weirdos ma ......

2020 Dec 06 - Brexit & Fishing

This past year people might not have been paying attention but the Brexit clock has steadily been ticking along, although for me the only clock it reminded me of is that one in the movie Groundhog Day where it flips over ever morning and Bill Murray has to do the same story to camera day after day after day. But in a year where Covid has dominated the news story it’s almost somewhat refreshing, a throwback to last year, seeing Michel Barnier stumbling out of a limo spouting a bunch of nonsense ......

2020 Nov 29 - Maradona & Iran

There were a couple non-Covid deaths this past week, notable the Argentine footballer Maradona who finally kicked/punched the bucket at the age of 60. In England the passing was celebrated by many, although he was of course deeply mourned in both Argentina and Scotland. I'm guessing that as a mark of respect there was maybe talk about removing all the white lines from the side of the pitch seeing as how Maradonna largely died at 60 because he cut more lines than an Audi driver in a hurry.

Elsew ......

2020 Nov 22 - Covid Update

I’m back this week after a last minute arranged little holiday before yet more lockdowns, so I guess in some respects I was learning from Rishi Sunak’s example of running up the credit card. Or possibly Kier Starmer’s example of spending a week not really doing any work. Or Boris’ for that matter. He’s supposedly on a new exercise regime following his Covid scare but given his work ethic I wonder if it mostly involves doing diddly-squats.

Mind you, of all the potential holidays going ......

2020 Nov 09 - US Election Aftermath

The aftermath of the US election has been a sordid mess and one in which the media’s analysis has been about as neutral as a listening to Jimmy Hill commentate on an England game against Germany. Except of course these day’s its former crisp salesman turned football pundit Garry Lineker offering insight on twitter. And just like Jimmy Hill, like many of the people who voted for Joe Biden died several years ago.

At time of recording Mr Biden has been announced as the winner although there ar ......

2020 Oct 31 - France, Labour & Election 2020

Couple of big stories this week. First there was yet another terrorist attack in France, and after the terrorist tried to buy C4 explosives and accidentally ordered a Citroen C4, this one involved a knife instead and a beheading. I have to give credit to the French police who kept their calm whilst many others were losing their head. President Macron was already about to start a lockdown for Coronavirus so let's see if whether lockdown curfew prevents Tunisian migrants as effectively as it does ......

2020 Oct 26 - General News Update

Let’s look at 4 new stories and show them the same level of respect that Jeff Bezos has for workers rights or the tax authorities

First of all to Spain where they’ve issued a new curfew to prevent the spread of Coronavirus. The government said that they didn’t want anyone to catch it, although they might have said that they didn’t want any Juan to catch it. I think I remember a story that the King of Spain has sequestered himself on his private jet until his Covid-19 results come back, ......

2020 Oct 19 - French Terror & Biden Corruption

I realised it's now the middle of October so I have to ask, how is everyone enjoying their 6 month free trial to the new world order? On the Corona front there's a new 3 tiers system and the whole thing is about as made up and opaque as the 33 tiers of freemasonry. I wonder how that's going these days? Presumably less handshaking thanks to Covid. And none of those weird midnight ceremonies, what with a 10pm curfew.

The big story this past week was in France where a history teacher was decapitat ......

2020 Oct 12 - One Month To Go Until The US Election

The other night I was watching a show on the BBC about recycling and landfill and just like a lot of other BBC programming, it was rubbish. So what has been going on?

There's a series of new lockdowns going on around the world as politicians struggle to prevent new Covid cases or in many cases use the news for self promotion. Looking at my home country of Scotland, the government announced that bars would close for 2 weeks although given that people were warned in advance and may have overdone ......

2020 Oct 05 - President Trump, Debate & Covid

They say that a week is a long time in politics but this last one seems to have been longer than the hold time when you try to contact the council. This week we’re talking about President Trump and one of the biggest October Surprises in election history. Maybe not the biggest, that would go to the Russians in October 1917 when Lenin decided to cancel the idea of an election and just kill people instead, a classic Russian election technique still employed to this day.

Let’s stick to Americ ......

2020 Sep 28 - US Supreme Court

Ok, what to talk about this week? I was encouraged by Boris saying that the world needs to unite against a common foe and I initially thought, that it was time to go to war with Germany again, it's been a while after all and it's about the only way that you could get a flight overseas right now, in the back of an Atlas C1. What else? Well there's the recent 'rule of six' law which could very well lead to a murder at the home of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves as they frantically try to avoid a ......

2020 Sep 21 - #Despite Brexit

A year ago seems like a different world, there was no Coronavirus (apart from inside that Chinese laboratory), and most folks were just desperately wishing that the news would stop going on about Brexit, I almost found myself reading the sports and entertainment section of the newspaper. But by far and away, the main people wanting to not hear about Brexit were the politicians trying to stop it. Most were just hoping that they could delay and delay and wear the public down until people eventuall ......